Sunday, 5 February 2012

Two Brooms

Two brooms were hanging in the closet and after a while they got to know each other so well, they decided to get married.

One broom was, of course, the bride broom, the other the groom broom.

The bride broom looked very beautiful in her white dress.

The groom broom was handsome and suave in his tuxedo.

The wedding was lovely.

After the wedding, at the wedding dinner, the bride-broom leaned over and said to the groom-broom, 'I think I am going to have a little whisk broom!'

'IMPOSSIBLE !' said the groom broom.


'WE HAVEN'T EVEN SWEPT TOGETHER!'

Saturday, 4 February 2012

WHERE'S MY CAR ???

Several days ago as I left a meeting at our church, I desperately gave myself a personal TSA pat down. I was looking for my keys. They were not in my pockets. A quick search in the meeting room revealed nothing. Suddenly I realized, I must have left them in the car.
 
Frantically I headed for the parking lot. My wife, Diane, has scolded me many times for leaving the keys in the ignition. My theory is the ignition is the best place not to lose them. Her theory is that the car will be stolen. As I burst through the doors of the church, I came to a terrifying conclusion. Her theory was right. The parking lot was empty.

I immediately call the police. I gave them my location, confessed that I had left my keys in the car, and that it had been stolen.

Then I made the most difficult call of all, “Honey,” I stammered. I always call her “honey” in times like these. “I left my keys in the car, and it has been stolen.”

There was a period of silence. I thought the call had been dropped, but then I heard Diane’s voice, “Ken,” she barked, “I dropped you off!”

 Now it was my time to be silent. Embarrassed, I said, “Well, come and get me.”

Diane retorted, “I will, as soon as I convince this policeman I have not stolen your car!”

Wednesday, 1 February 2012

New Wine for Seniors

http://www.free-wallpapers-free.com/preview/grapes-6/
A  single glass at night could mean a peaceful, uninterrupted  nights sleep.
           
NEW Wine for Seniors
I kid you not...


California  vintners in the Napa  Valley area,  which primarily  produce
 
Pinot  Blanc, Pinot Noir, and Pinot Grigio  wines, 

have  developed a new hybrid  grape that  acts as an anti-diuretic.
 
It  is expected to reduce the number of  trips older  people have to make to the
bathroom during  the night.

The new wine will be marketed  as...

 


PINO  MORE

I heard it through the grapevine!!!